Long have we knelt at the shrine of St. Barbie. At last, here are some brand new Barbie dolls to coincide with her and our aging gracefully. Finally Barbies we women can relate to! Now is it hot in here or what?!

Bifocals Barbie:  Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!), neck chain, high-intensity light and large-print editions of PlayGirl, Vanity Fair and Martha Stewart Living.

Hot Flash Barbie:  Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with handheld fan and tiny tissues. No clothing available for this model.

Facial Hair Barbie:  As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available with teensy tweezers and extra strong magnifying mirror.

Flabby Arms Barbie:  Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with these new, roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news on the tummy front, two muumuus with tummy-support panels are included. Support hose & sensible shoes extra.

Bunion Barbie:  Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on those fashionable soft terry mules.

No-More-Wrinkles Barbie:  Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics. Wonderbra and support long leg briefs included.

Soccer Mom Barbie:  All that experience as a cheerleader is really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr. Comes with minivan in robin-egg blue or white and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.

Mid-life Crisis Barbie:  It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and Antonio (her personal trainer) is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They're hopping in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B&B. includes a real tape of "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do."

Divorced Barbie:  Sells for $199.99. Comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, Ken's boat, & keys to Ken's safe deposit box. Pull string laughter extra.

Recovery Barbie:  Too many parties have finally caught up with the ultimate party girl. Now she does Twelve Steps instead of dance steps. Clean and sober, she's going to meetings religiously. Comes with a little copy of The Big Book, a Dr. Phil consult and a six-pack of Diet Coke.

Post-Menopausal Barbie:  This Barbie wets her pants when she sneezes, forgets where she puts things, and cries a lot. She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching the tube, clicking through the channels. Comes with Depends and Kleenex. As a bonus this year, the book "Getting In Touch with Your Inner Self" is included plus two free tickets to see Oprah!