Momma's Giggles 'n Guffaws: Outta The Mouths of Babes!

Outta The Mouths of Babes!

Kids on the Subject of Love...

WHAT IS THE PROPER AGE TO GET MARRIED?

"Eighty-four! Because at that age, you don't have to work anymore, and you can spend all your time loving each other in your bedroom." (Judy, 8)

"Once I'm done with kindergarten, I'm going to find me a wife!" (Tom, 5)

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date." (Mike, 10)

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

"You should never kiss a girl unless you have enough bucks to buy her a big ring and her own VCR, 'cause she'll want to have videos of the wedding." (Jim, 10)

"Never kiss in front of other people. It's a big embarrassing thing if anybody sees you. But if nobody sees you, I might be willing to try it with a handsome boy, but just for a few hours." (Kally, 9)

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

"It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need somebody to clean up after them!" (Lynette, 9)

"It gives me a headache to think about that stuff. I'm just a kid. I don't need that kind of trouble." (Kenny, 7)

CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE

"I'm in favor of love as long as it doesn't happen when 'The Simpsons' is on television." (Anita, 6)

"Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I have been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me." (Bobby, 8)

"I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough." (Regina, 10)

PERSONAL QUALITIES NECESSARY TO BE A GOOD LOVER

"One of you should know how to write a cheque. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills." (Ava, 8)

SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU

"Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores." (Del, 6)

HOW CAN YOU TELL IF TWO ADULTS EATING DINNER AT A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE?

"Just see if the man picks up the bill. That's how you can tell if he's in love." (John, 9)

"Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold. Other people care more about the food." (Brad, 8)

"It's love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it's just like how their hearts are... on fire." (Christine, 9)

More Kids' Comments On Love...

... Contributed by Dan-E Kim

THE ORIGINS OF LOVE:

"Cupid kissed God and that got the ball rolling." ... Julio, age 9
"One of the Greek lady gods got a crush on one of the Greek man gods. He tried to hit her with lightning and thunderbolts, but he just couldn't get her away from him...After a while, they became the first married gods." ... Robbie, age 8

WHY LOVE HAPPENS BETWEEN TWO PARTICULAR PEOPLE:

"One of the people has freckles and so he finds somebody else who has freckles too." ... Andrew, age 6
"No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell... That's why perfume and deodorant are so popular." ... Mae, age 9
"I think you're supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isn't supposed to be so painful." ... Manuel, age 8

WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE:

"Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life." ... John, age 9
"If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't want to do it. It takes too long." ...Glenn, age 7

ON THE ROLE OF BEAUTY AND HANDSOMENESS IN LOVE:

"If you want to be loved by somebody who isn't already in your family, it doesn't hurt to be beautiful." ... Anita, age 8
"It isn't always just how you look. Look at me. I'm handsome like anything and I haven't got anybody to marry me yet." ... Brian, age 7
"Beauty is skin deep. But how rich you are can last a long time." ...
Christine, age 9

REFLECTIONS ON THE NATURE OF LOVE:

"Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too." ... Greg, age 8

HOW DO PEOPLE IN LOVE TYPICALLY BEHAVE?

"Mooshy...like puppy dogs...except puppy dogs don't wag their tails nearly as much." ... Arnold, age 10
"When a person gets kissed for the first time they fall down and they don't get up for at least an hour." ... Wendy, age 8
"All of a sudden, the people get movie fever so they can sit together in the dark." ... Sherm, age 8

WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS:

"They want to make sure their rings don't fall off because they paid good money for them." ... Gavin, age 8
"They are just practicing for when they might have to walk down the aisle someday and do the holy matchimony thing." ... John, age 9

CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE:

"I'm in favor of love as long as it doesn't happen when 'Dinosaurs' is on television." ... Jill, age 6
"Love is foolish... but I still might try it sometime." ... Floyd, age 9
"Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I've been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me." ... Dave, age 8
"I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough." ... Regina, age 10

THE PERSONAL QUALITIES YOU NEED TO HAVE IN ORDER TO BE A GOOD LOVER:

"Sensitivity don't hurt." ... Robbie, age 8
"One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills." ... Ava, age 8

SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU:

"Tell them you own a whole bunch of candy stores." ... Del, age 6

"Shake your hips and hope for the best." ... Camille, age 9

"Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs...and don't worry if their parents are right there." ... Manuel, age 8

"Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love." ... Alonzo, age 9

"One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me." ... Bart, age 9